This is a story which some of you may think of as a unrealistic story and some may say its quite possible. As the name suggests that this is a modern age story with no proper end. The end is to be decided by you all who read it. The names are changed on the request of the people who are part of this story.
This is about 2 people who are in a friendship for more then 6 years. As you would have guessed that its about a boy and a girl. Yes you are correct J. This is about Zameer and Sapna. Zameer and Sapna met online 6 years back on MSN chat (that time it was working in India). At first the conversation started in a normal way where they exchanged some of their personal info. Then they added each other on MSN Messenger and soon began chatting regularly. Over a period of time they started waiting for each other to come online. Before we go ahead some insight about Zameer.
Zameer came from a financially weak background where his family was still recovering from a financial setback. This was the period when Zameer was working at a place which paid him very low but he was happy with his job because he was learning something new all the time. Also emotionally he was going through a face which any 21 – 22 year old person would go through when they need someone special in their life to share something. Zameer was always known to be an introvert who would open up to a selected few. He was in a stage where among net friends he was looking for that one special friend. So yes he would at times try his luck a lot. But overall he was still very reserved.
Zameer had completed his studies while Sapna had said that she was still studying. While exchanging their thoughts Zameer found that Sapna was from the same college from which he completed his studies. However, whenever Zameer discussed about their college Sapna would not like it. Sapna said that she did not like to discuss about her college as she is not happy going there and is forced to go to that college. This friendship slowly started becoming more and more serious. And yes I know whats coming to your mind. That this is becoming another of those stories that you have heard before that both end up being in love.
Well, you can call it love, infatuation, addiction or net fever. So yes they start to tell each other that they feel something for each other and all that stuff. However, who do you think out of them is telling the truth? Are they lying to each other or to themselves. Well Sapna avoiding discussions related to her studies lead Zameer to suspect something. Zameer was a beta tester with an online community which was backed by big IT giants and decided to use some of his links with them to get some more details about Sapna. He was finally successful in getting her account details on MSN. The result was a big shock to Zameer. To his surprise Sapna was 6 years younger to him. And was still in school. Zameer was really furious as he felt that he opened his heart to someone who turned to be a fake person on the net. The next time when Sapna came online Zameer went ahead and pasted all her details giving a shock to Sapna. Initially she did not except it but when Zameer threatened to inform her parents about what she does on the net she accepted it. But Zameer was still curious to know the reason for it. Sapna said that she was still in school and being a girl also it was difficult for her to trust people online and the best way she thought was to hide her true identity.
Zameer felt that this was a valid point and accepted it. However, Sapna still wanted to be friends with Zameer and he also agreed to it. So from that point onwards it was the beginning of an actual friendship. Strange it make sound but they were still good friends.
After sometime Zameer had to look out for a better paying job and moved into a BPO. There he was working in nights and had no access to external messengers or chat. However, he would go on his weekends and check his mails from a cyber café and meet friends online. But he and Sapna could not co-ordinate to meet online as Zameer would mostly go to check his mails at night time. But still off and on they used to write mails to each other. The best part was that they never used to send fwded emails to each other. But just discuss what was happening in their lives. Both were happy to have a friend with whom they could share their life.
This continued for a few years. Then Zameer became too busy with his work. He had grown in his organization and was handling multiple responsibilities. This slowly resulted of him not being in contact with most of his friends. He was too involved with his work and was practically having no personal life. For almost, 1 ½ years Sapna and Zameer did not talk with each other. There was that occasional mail in between from Sapna but Zameer was busy in his own world.
So after this 1 ½ year gap Zameer and Sapna met online. Both were happy to see each other online. Sapna had a lot to say but Zameer had changed. He had become a complete introvert and a workaholic. Zameer was most of the time at work spending very little time at home. Sapna was surprised as Zameer was an ambitious person but family was always his first priority. Sapna found something wrong with Zameer. And after persistent probing found the problem. Zameer was in a relationship with a girl at his workplace which ended up on a sad note. Zameer was in love with a girl who was extremely different from someone he ever wanted. He wanted to stop thinking about her and found only one way to do it. That was to submerge himself in work. This resulted in him having no social life at all.
Zameer would be a normal person for everyone at home and at work. But inside was hiding a lot of things. So after a long time Zameer and Sapna startedto chat regularly.
Sapna’s life had also seen a lot of changes. She had moved into a world where she was discovering new things in her college life. The experience was completely different. New friends, new things to learn, new atmosphere. All was going really good for her. Sapna was a good financial background and did not had much responsibilities.
So Zameer and Sapna were at two extreme ends in their respective life. But still both use to discuss a lot about their lifes. Well its not that they never had fights. Yes they fought a lot. But no fight was bigger then their friendship. Things which changed over the years were the messengers from MSN to Gtalk but there was no change in their friendship. They would discuss work, college life, about friends, home, movies, health, songs etc etc.
But what was interesting is that in all these years (almost 4 years) they never spoke with each other. Zameer felt that most of their fights were a result of their misunderstandings which was a result of chats as both were not able to communicate their exact view point on chat. So at times Zameer insisted on asking Sapna her mobile number. But Sapna said that her mom would not allow it. This would really at times frustrate Zameer but then he respected Sapna’s feelings and did not force for it.
Sapna wanted to see him but was not ready to share her pic. Zameer mailed his pic to her but did not force her for a pic.
However, one day both got an opportunity to do voice chat on Gtalk. Sapna was not having a Mic but could hear Zameer. They decide to go ahead with it. So Sapna would write and Zameer would talk. Weird it may sound but they were ok with it. During the talk Zameer laughed with a broad smile and Sapna was happy to hear it and said that he should be always be happy like that. Zameer felt a connect between them.
After sometime Zameer realized that he was feeling something special for Sapna. He was unsure of his feelings for her. But was moreover reluctant to give himself a second chance. The fear of rejection was something which was really that he was afraid of. He had a difficult time recovering from his broken relationship.
However, on the other hand he found that Sapna was always encouraging her to find some girl and to give himself a second chance. Sapna would always wish that Zameer should get someone who would really care for him and wanted him to think positively about it.
Well, with changing times things changed and Sapna got a permission from her mom to speak with Zameer on his birthday. Zameer got a shock of his life when Sapna called up. He didn’t knew what to say. Sapna was cool and was wondering why Zameer was not sounding normal. They spoke for sometime but felt really good about it. After a few months Sapna’s birthday was coming and Zameer really wanted to talk with her. Sapna took permission from her mom and Zameer called her up. This time they spoke for a longer time and found it really difficult to end the talk. What was again different was the fact that both had each others number but Sapna didn’t wanted to go against her mom and Zameer respected Sapna’s feelings.
One day finally Zameer told Sapna that he felt something for her but was not sure of his feelings. He was happy that he felt something for her but was clear that he had no expectations from her to reciprocate his feelings. This was something which Sapna appreciated a lot. Zameer never felt the need for another girl as he always had Sapna.
Things were going well until one day when faith played a trick. Zameer had helped Sapna create an account on Gmail using which they would chat. Also Zameer would help Sapna increase her mailbox size on MSN and would himself at times customize her accounts to make things easier for Sapna. Sapna was aware of this and had complete trust in Zameer. One day when Zameer was customizing her Gmail account he happened to accidentally click on her saved chats. While moving out of it he saw his name in one of the chats. Curiosity took over and he went and read the chat. This was were Sapna was discussing about Zameer with her friend. This lead to him reading other chats were Zameer was being discussed. The result was unexpected.
Sapna had written that she felt something for Zameer but didn’t knew what this was. She had feelings for another guy also but was going through a lot of confusion. In one of the chats she mentioned her helplessness that she wants to meet Zameer but cannot. Zameer found that there have been times when Sapna was just waiting online for Zameer. Also, seeing her feelings increasing her mom wanted her to stop talking with Zameer at one point of time. Sapna would not get a proper response from the other guy whom she loved and would feel that Zameer was understanding her properly. Sapna would say that she was not having any feelings now for the other guy but would still feel bad when he would not respond to her. In her discussion when her friend asked her whether she had any problem with the differences between Zameer and her with regards to age, religion or backgrounds she would say that she would never mind it.
Zameer found that Sapna was in a state where she had a lot of confusion caused in her life because of him. Sapna was happy in her world, had a lot of friends, good family but when it came to that special person it would always lead to a confusion for her.
Zameer decided that he should move out of the picture so that Sapna can realize her true feelings and be happy. Moreover, its been 6 years since they know each other and with time their attachment towards each other is increasing. But Zameer knew that there was not much future as they were two individuals from two different backgrounds. Practically things would be not be easy for both of them. Also, Zameer discovered that earlier he would not expect much from her but after reading the chats he had started expecting things which he felt were not correct. He knew that with time this would just keep increasing. Zameer decided to discuss this with her. But was not able to discuss it completely and properly on chat. However, he would not be able to discuss this on phone also as they talk only twice in a year. So finally, Zameer decided to end this relationship on her birthday after speaking with her. He knew that was not the right day but he was left with very little choice.
So, on her birthday they spoke for hours and then Zameer told her about it. She was shocked. She had thought that things were sorted out. She tried to convince him but he was not ready. Finally, they decided to discuss it one more time on chat.
After a few days when they met online they discussed it. But Sapna was not agreeing on it. She however, had no answers for Zameer’s questions. Zameer was thinking practically but Sapna wanted him to think positively. She wanted him to let time decide about what will happen between them. But Zameer, was thinking that the more it continues the end will be more difficult to accept. And keeping in mind his family situation he couldn’t afford another breakdown. He was holding his family together and if he becomes weak for any reason they would also breakdown.
They kept arguing but finally decided that they would stop talking for a month first and see how it works. This would help them realize whether it is just an addiction or something else.
This story now from here has no end. It is up to you to decide the end. Zameer and Sapna may be real may not be. But if you feel something about this or want to give a feedback about this you can mail me at husein.chitalwala@gmail.com
This is all about choices we make, how brave we are or how practical we are, how strong we are to take a setback or how aware are we about our strengths, the choice between “whats priority for us is it important” or “whats important for us is it a priority”.
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